||SARAH BENNETT: Gemma lee
Top administrator at
'Staines' Brewery. A lady who will stop at nothing and step
on everything to get her way. She and Mark Anderson have
history - and she is in posession of an envelope, the contents of which
he has cause to fear.
||PC NICK ROZZEY: Tom Gregory
young police officer who dreams of beating up and shooting people -
only the bad ones of course! But in the real world he is not
allowed to do this, which makes him very un-happy.
Until one day...
||MARK ANDERSON: David Watkins
Senior researcher at 'Staines'
Brewery. A man with a conscience who nevertheless needs to
keep his job. He and Sarah Bennett have history and
he is a little scared of her.
||JAMAICAN TAKEAWAY ZOMBIE: Andrew
Loves his food, especially off the
bone! Battling with his vegetarian
||DRUNK DRIVER HALF-ZOMBIE: Tanya
has more points on her licence than Victoria Beckham has brain
cells. Although, now un-dead, her driving has drastically
||BEGGING HALF-ZOMBIE: Terry
Used to be England's
youngest ever Football coach. He was sacked when
they lost to Wales. Things went down-hill from
there - if that is possible!
||CRAZED HALF-ZOMBIE: Jo
One of the first to taste the
lethal tipple! Full of energy, this zombie takes no prisoners!
||RUSS, SWAYING SEX GOD ZOMBIE:
Loves to enjoy himself fervently.
believes that there is 'nothing like a happy party
atmosphere'. A wannabe celebrity who attracts gorgeous women... for
some unknown reason.
TRINNI, SUZANNAH, PRINCESS NICKI
Four gorgeous young
women who date below their station. After seeing their
stud-muffin Russ, frisked by the cops they rush to comfort him, only to
him fall to bits.
||JADE: Linda Timms
Dreams of being the most
inful... influenza... most richest person in the earff.
Would luv Russ if she could spell the word.
Believes she has great
fashion sense and is desperate to have Russ's Babies and then sell THAT
story to the tabloids!
||NIKKI: Rosalyn Taylor
The life and soul of the
party (when released from her straight jacket) Loves Russ... to Bits!
||SUZANNAH: Ruth Pike
Knows she has great
She loves herself and is convinced that Russ loves her, But
only person he loves is himself. Oh Suzannah!
||DADDY BLUE: Kevin Ladd
Football fanatic dad
that wants his son to be the next David Beckham. It ain't
||BLIND DATE ZOMBIE: Jenna X
Sitting in the morning
Sun, Chilling and having fun - When who should come along but greasy
||JANE-BLOND ZOMBIE: Natasha
After a freak accident
with a bottle of bear, the last thing Jane needs is hassle from a local
||SONNY JIM: Jake Maidment
Typical teen, Just wants to veg in
front of the telly with his Playstation!
||LEAPING ZOMBIE: Angeless
A former Olympic Swimmer,
described by critics as The 'Eddie The Eagle' of the pool ( So how come
he didn't drown!!!!!!). He is growing his hair for a bet -
which he is well on the way to winning.
||O'SCARO: IDENTITY-CARD ZOMBIE:
Just wants to be left alone to
do her own thing, has a fiery temper and enjoys a good
||MACK P. STAINES: Brian
Aged in his early 60's and a bit
"Ladies Man" Mack Staines is oblivious to what is going on in his
company... Typical Chairman of the Board!
||GREASY GEEZER: Andrew Holmes
Greasy Looking Geezer - tall, dark
and handsome - at least in his own mind. If stalking were a
national sport he would win the gold medal!
||ALBERT WEINSTEIN: Steve
Middle aged and your typical
mad-scientist type. Albert is a loner and lives to work. It must be at
least 5 years since he last brushed his hair!
||LEVI WEEDS: Clint Bell
He has made his fortune selling
his granny's sauce recipe to capitalist western pigs. They in
turn have booted him out on to the streets to promote their product for
them. Little does Levi know his sauce is about to attract a
corner of the market that even he could not have predicted.
||KNUCKLES: Stuart Thompson
Proof that 'intelligent' and
'Life' do not necessarily belong in the same sentence. Give him a box
of matches and he would still be unable to invent fire.
||RADIO NEWS REPORTER: Shirley
Radio News Broadcaster of
obviously vast experience. A reassuring voice in the world of insanity.
||YOUNG ZOMBIE: Courtney Loveridge
A playful child who loves the
Teletubbies(TM) and all things "Kiddy". How
can anyone ignore her cheeky smile?
||KNUCKLES' GRANNY: Shirley
A timid old lady that like
& Dec. Believes she's next in line for the thrown, Owns two
names: charles & camilla. She has a rather bad incontinencs
but hides it
really well. She loves to chat to herself and dreams about meeting Ant
or is it Dec?, as she doesn't actually know which one is which.
||JACK, STAGGERING HEAD WOUND GUY:
Has an inner ear problem, hence
the staggering. Is immune to mace, but is not a
zombie. Try telling PC Nick Rozzey that!
||TRUDY 'MISS WORLD' SCRUMPIOUS:
Pretty girl who gives all her
attention to her dog. Whilst walking in the park one day she has a
||BOB THE DRUNKEN ALCOHOLIC:
Partial to a tipple, but today he
has over-done it. He is gonna have a 'splitting' head in the morning.
||SALLY THE YOUNG MUM: Charlie
Attractive mother of Stanley
likes taking walks in Parks and talking to complete strangers. She is
completely unaware that something is amiss with her newly born baby.
||MARTIA THE ZOMBIE PEEG TISSUE REP:
Another Cosovoan illegal Immigrant
forced to sell 'homeless' magazines on street corners in Tony Blairs
||BILLIE SQUEAMISH: Carolyn
Billie works in the
London Stock-Exchange normally but she's not herself at the moment and
is unwillingly donating her time to a science experiment.
||Zoe: Zoe Ombey
A dribbling six month old
cutie. Likes keeping her mum awake through the night and
filling her nappies with smelly brown goo.
||CITY SLICKER ZOMBIE: Garry
He may be undead, but he's never
been late for work in his life!
||Ronnie Kray Zombie: Barry
The brains of the outfit- when he
picks them up off the pavement.
||Reggie Kray Zombie (aka' Yob Zombie): Jamz
In an IQ test with his sawn-off
shotgun, he would lose. You would'nt want to mess with this dead guy!
very important people (though not as important as the 'Big Brother'
in(ane)mates.) Called to yet another boring lecture'
regarding 'THE END OF THE WORLD' they just want to be at home with
their loved one - or their wives/husbands/children/goats...
They entertain themselves by thinking about which tiny,
impoverished country they can declare war on next.
||DELEGATE: Rob Merrett
Tired and bored. A
wanabee stand-up comedian. his love for the bottle means he is rarely
able to stand up.
||DELEGATE: Vincent Masi
An ex-game show host. He
lost his job after accidentally killing a member of the audience with a
An American who lives in
world. he is looking forward to the day he ascends to Heaven, God is
already packing to move downstairs.
Worn-down ex-mafia crime
lord. He removed the cotton-wool and settled down in a flat
||DELEGATE: Jo Lund
housewife. Spends most of her life on her mobile-phone.
Bored coated in
ex-beauty therapist in love with Wayne Rooney, Wants to be his WAG!
She thinks politics are a load of poo!
Overworked and Bored.
Takes her job
seriously. She was disappointed that the world did not end on the
Millennium and has been pee-ed off with the government ever since.
||DELEGATE 7: David
Very bored. he only
turns up to
functions for the food and booze. He can normally be found playing golf
with Charles W. Boussh. Don't tell his wife!
The cream of the
Televisual News Industry. All are obviously disturbed by the
news of people rising from the dead. They are equally
disturbed by the fact that a rival reporter may win a prize for getting
the story on air first. If they were not holding microhones
and cameras they would all be stabbing each
||NEWS CREW: Joy-Amy
She uses her good looks
to get to the top of her profession.
||NEWS CREW 5: Chris
Rough around the edges.
||NEWS CREW: Ruth Pike
||NEWS CREW: Andy
||KUJO THE LOVABLE DOG: Jack
Prefers Oak telegraph poles to beech. Pin-point strategic
crapper. Missed his vocation, Should have been a
bomb aimer in the USAF. When he grows up he wants to be